Thursday, July 12, 2012 :: To A Friend Out There Fighting Cancer


I am writing this post for a friend whom is fighting against odds, against time, against cancer at this very moment. I may not know him well. In fact, I can count the number of times I meet him. 

The first time in Cineleisure Orchard, just outside the cinema where John stopped to say hi to him and his girlfriend. It was then I learnt that John and his big brother, Gabriel, are friends with this guy since the longest time. When John was in Primary 1, this guy together with Gabriel was Primary 6.
I still remember how beautiful his girlfriend was outside the cinema. 
I still remember I said "John, what a lucky guy your friend is.". 

The second time I met him at the company he worked at, selling cars for a living. We dropped him a visit to learn more about the cars he is selling because John wanted to change a new car. 

The third time I met him was again, at his company to test drive a car. In the confined space within a car, I felt the sincerity of this man and how hardworking he is, working hard to earn a living. Despite the many questions we had for him, he answered all of them patiently although we can tell, he was a busy man with other sales calls to make. 

The last time I met him, was a few weeks later when he called us to inform a car suited to our needs have just arrived and we dropped by to have a look. 

I met him only 4 times. Strangely, this world works in a wonderful way. Maybe because this man is one of Gabriel's best friends, and John being Gabriel's brother, then me being John's girlfriend, I feel really close to him even though we barely spoke more than a "hi" and a few smiles. This connection is....unexplainable. It makes me tear terribly as I am penning this post because I have this overwhelming concern, admiration and sadness for this friend whom I have never spoken to. 

The day I came to know that this friend was fighting against cancer till the day when we found out he has only 6 months from now to live, my heart sank, I teared, I asked John why did it happened to him. Why did it happened to someone close to us. Why?

Everyday, every single one of us is fighting for something that we want.
I know of someone whom is undergoing breast implants to be prettier. 
I know of someone whom is fighting to get a degree. 
I know of many whom is fighting to get a job. 
I know of someone whom is fighting to repay off a debt. 
I know of someone whom is fighting to make a difference.
There may be someone out there who wants a new phone, a new house, a rich boyfriend, a new car. 
But I believe to someone whom is fighting cancer, he only wants to win this battle. To live on. 

Do you know how strong you have to be, to be able to feel happy being alive every morning you wake up yet knowing every day you open your eyes, is one day closer to the end? 

"I am prepared for the worst guys, just that I will miss you guys a great deal! If anything happens...live your life for me and always remember me."

For that, yes, I will always remember you. Being a stranger to me, you had already made the biggest impact in my life. I will always remember how strong you are. 

Looking through his facebook, he is being extremely grateful for being able to wake up every morning to greet the people all around him. 

"I will always say good morning ah from today onwards! You all must always reply!" 

And I see so many supportive friends who greet him every morning they wake up, giving him emotional strength to carry on fighting. 

"I will not give up till the very end. This I can assure all my friends out there." 
His promise and assurance to all his friends.

And his beautiful girlfriend who is staying by his side to give support said,
"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength." 

 Two nights ago, I asked John, what will happen to his girlfriend if he loses this battle. He gave me a reply which there will never be an answer to. He said there are many possibilities out there. But this sorrow which may become her biggest regret is she will never get to experience how her life and her future would be if they start a family together. My heart stopped upon hearing that. It is such an unexplainable aching feeling, as though someone just stabbed me in my heart. 



To Don Chua, 
you are a very brave man.
To many, the word "cancer" make us tremble in fear and lose all hopes but you didn't allow yourself to fall to the cult of victimology in this modern world. Like what your girlfriend has said, it is very easy to give up. But you did not. I don't know where the immense strength in you comes from, but I would salute you and always remember your fighting spirit.
While many of us can realistically think about the future, how many of us live each day meaningfully?
Although this is a tough war you are fighting against, one thing for sure, your life has been exhalted by this battle - with so much brightness and a terrible clarity to it. This higher form of life you are living now, will bring you power. Power to conquer this battle. 


To Erica Yeo, 
one of the most beautiful woman I have seen in my life, you are everything a man can ask for. You sustain Don with your beautiful smile and your compassionate nature. I believe you are in fact his healing medicine, his form of nourishment.
I know you will fight through hell with Don and make the life in your years count. Not the years in your life. 
Use the word "impossible" with the greatest caution because Don has taught us, with hope, anything is possible :*) 


With Love,
Tricia

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